Fantabulous

The Goat would like to take this opportunity to record that he considers Itisalot a fabulous^[1] organisation. Continuing the saga of moving an email account name from Ye Olde Dialle-Uppe to broadband, it turns out that for various unfathomable reasons it’s “not possible” to have a user name of fewer than nine characters. Actually, having penetrated the clouds of obfuscation, the Goat learned that the main user name can have seven characters, or even fewer. Additional email addresses under the same account - plus any aliases - must have at least nine characters.

In a fantastic^[2] display of customer service, Itisalot eventually accepted hand-delivered application forms (along with passport copy, visa page, signed affidavit from male relative, No Objection letter from sponsor…) to shut down the Dialle-Uppe account and rename the broadband with the same name. At 8:00am on 17th June, this process would take “two hours”. Nine telephone enquiries, six personal visits to the Deira golf-ball, and a fortnight later, there remain “technical problems.” Magic^[3]!

On the subject of magic^[3], The Goat was gratified to receive in his newly-named nine-characters-or-more inbox an electronic missive allegedly from Itisalot that advertises internet HotSpots: “Click here”.

D’oh! This is the same Itisalot that asks us not to click on email links lest they are part of someone’s phishing expedition. The suspected spam was of course immediately forwarded to Itisalot.

[1]‘Fabulous’ adj. Barely credible; not corresponding to acknowledged facts or criteria.
[2]‘Fantastic’ adj. Lacking in reality, substance or genuineness.
[3]‘Magic’ adj. Technology that you don’t understand.

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