Friday, July 03, 2015

Red tape

Following about nine iterations of a design report (and its many friends), wherein American design standards were specified where Dunkrugerstan standards were inapplicable or inappropriate, the Minister of Paper Clips decided that reference to these American standards would not be allowed. The Minister of Paper Clips had previously specified in the contract that American standards should be adopted, but this was no longer relevant.

Instead, the Trusted Advisor was required to use Dunkrugerstan standards. Where this would not be achievable, alternative international standards could be proposed, but citing any of these would not be allowed.

The Trusted Advisor was therefore required to prove all of his alternative designs from first principles. As most of the research had been originally carried out in America, these figures could not be used, and no local research had ever been undertaken throughout the history of Dunkrugerstan. 

Thus the task now set by the Ministry of Paper Clips was actually impossible, and there was nothing for it but to go to the Minister for Streets and request that he ask the Minister for Houses to demolish a newly-built palace owned by the Grand Frommaj.

Fearful of one of the Grand Frommaj’s infamous rages, the Minister for Houses absolutely refused. The Minister for Streets therefore also refused, and the Trusted Advisor was thus unable to complete his project.

So when the most famous Grand Tournament in the world arrived and the project lay incomplete, the international press ridiculed Dunkrugerstan. Naturally, the Grand Frommaj blamed the entire Council of Ministers, who blamed one another, but mostly blamed the Trusted Advisor. But who was to blame was of no consequence to the international press, who only saw that the project was unfinished and that Dunkrugerstan was to blame.

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1 comment:

Gnomad said...

I see the Acme Mobile Goalposts are fully utilised again

 

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