Sunday, July 13, 2008

Fire in the hole

This is not a restaurant review. I couldn't possibly compete with the Fat Expats HMHB and Alexander... Mine is merely an observation of a particular stereotype, and in no way targets any specific eatery, not even this one or this Bollywood [Bum] Burner. I bet they come close, though.

Please feel free to blame my muse's inspiration on Irving Berlin and Mel Brooks.

Onion bhajee,
Chicken tikka,
Hot spicy lamb,
And when it hits,
You will get the squits.

Keema naan,
Paratha bread,
Deep-fried mutton,
You'll be well-fed.
Capsicum bits:
Giving you the squits.
    Pick a restaurant that's not too classy.
    Wash it down with half a pint of lassi.
    (Don't be fussy)
Now try the
Gulab jamun,
Or some kulfi
With cold laban
To cool your bits
When you've got the squits.



alexander... said...

Gawd bless yer, Mr Goat...

Toilet paper in freezer putting...


Grumpy Goat said...

I couldn't bring myself to include an image of moist bathroom tissue (with aloe vera and calamine lotion).

Gnomad said...

J'accuse, m'sieur le Goat!

This is not new! (wags finger)

I have definite recollections of some twenty odd years ago your very own version of "Givin' you the squits" very similar to this rendition,

Are you now reduced to doing cover version of your greatest hits?

I remember also the joy and relief in the Perp House (of our student days) on the advent of "Häkle Moists", the first refrigeratable moist toilet tissue! The blessed relief, the queue!

The Bombay Express (76, Albert Rd, Portsmouth, UK (tel [+44] 02392 821661) is still there and still as good as ever :)


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