Wednesday, December 28, 2005

I like bouncing. Boing! Boing! Boing!

I was given a pair of Powerisers for Christmas. A cross between stilts and strap-on pogo-sticks, the blurb promises that I should be able to jump six feet into the air, take nine-foot strides and run at 20mph. The manual also suggests that I should avoid carpets, soft grass, stairs and the public highway. I guess the beach is right out too.

At the moment I'm trying to learn to walk again from scratch. The trouble is, this time I'm 7'3" tall so when I hit the ground I do so with rather more force than I did fortysomething years ago. These things are not for indoor use, at least not where there are items of furniture to blunder into and damage.

If not compulsory, a helmet and elbow and knee pads are definitely recommended. I look like a refugee from a Judge Dredd cartoon strip.

Officially, the springs - huge fibreglass leaf springs that act like Achilles tendons - are rated for users who weigh between 70kg and 90kg. They have the imaginative part number 7090. I am assured that although I'm heavier than 90kg the additional weight won't hurt the Powerisers, but I won't be able to jump as high. I'm also advised that my additional post-Christmas bloat will soon disappear as a result of the full-body workout that using Powerisers requires!


nickybkrsfld said...

What the heck are powerrisers and where have I been to have missed them? Who bought you a present with the proviso "Please note that any injury or death caused by the use or misuse of Powerisers is not our responsibility!" Are they trying to tell you something?!!

Grumpy Goat said...

Mme Cyn did.

I had been going on about them since I saw a guy half my age (and weight!) bouncing around outside HMS Victory back in August.

Mme Cyn said...

Well, Nix, since Madame Cyn has no (grand)children to indulge, and since a certain Spoiled Goat mentioned them every other day for about five months, I figured, well....

Besides, have you read the warnings on SCUBA gear?

Anonymous said...

Yeah powerisers are really cool. I just set up a site about Powerisers called Poweriser Pages, which includes a Forum, a Gallery and a Blog.

Andy R said...

I have set up Powerising website containing a useful knowledge base with tips on how to get started with Powerisers. It also sells 'Original Powerisers' with free delivery to the UK mainland

Hope to see you soon


The opinions expressed in this weblog are the works of the Grumpy Goat, and are not necessarily the opinions shared by any person or organisation who may be referenced. Come to that, the opinions may not even be those of the Grumpy Goat, who could just be playing Devil's Advocate. Some posts may be of parody or satyrical [sic] nature. Nothing herein should be taken too seriously. The Grumpy Goat would prefer that offensive language or opinions not be posted in the comments. Offensive comments may be subject to deletion at the Grumpy Goat's sole discretion. The Grumpy Goat is not responsible for the content of other blogs or websites that are linked from this weblog. No goats were harmed in the making of this blog. Any resemblance to individuals or organisations mentioned herein and those that actually exist may or may not be intentional. May contain nuts.