Wednesday, July 26, 2006


I've not done any on-line banking with the Red Triangles for a couple of weeks. Time, I thought, to check my balance and see how much of my recent credit card activity has filtered through the system.

Silly me! I fluffed up my password and had to reset it. Serves me right for not using it for a fortnight. Maffi mushkela. Reset password. Telephone bank to reactivate the account:

GG: Good afternoon. I've reset my internet banking password and a message says I have to phone you to get it activated.

HelpDesk: Indeed. What is your account number? And please key in your phone banking PIN.

GG: [fiddles with phone keypad, thereby proving his identity]

HD: Hello Mr Grumpy Goat. How much money is in your account?

GG: I don't know. I can't get on line.

HD: How much is in your deposit account?

GG: Errr, not sure. As I just told you, I can't get on line.

HD: What is the credit limit on your plastic card?

GG: Not a Scooby, I'm afraid. I could tell you if I could get on line.

HD: Date of birth?

GG: Bingo! I know that one.

HD: Very well, Mr Goat. You have demonstrated that you could be almost anyone, so your account will be reactivated within an hour.

And I can confirm that the account was indeed reactivated.


LawfulGoodOfCowplain said...

A similar fascinating experience with, well, the same triangles.

I wish to set up a standing order to pay mooring fees. I key in the details, press the send button and "You have enetered incorrect data.". Repeat x 4, becoming increasingly grouchy and even checking that July has 31 days twice. Ferret through the website (timing out en route) to find the helpdesk call number. The charming lady from the subcontinent advised that "seven figure account numbers require an extra leading zero". I was a tad short about this, suggesting that it should have been in both the error file and the help file, rather than appearing on my telephone bill. Charming lady agrees that this would be an improvement, but that permission to specify this fact would be needed from the target bank in question. This permisssion had not been granted. I forbore to ask if it had been sought, after all, charming ladies in subcontinental call centres must be kept in gainful employment. Oh, and if you have an 0845 type number in the UK you, the "owner" of the number, get a % of the ca;ll charges incurred by the hapless punter kept on hold for 20 minutes. Bank involved black horses should anyone care.

El Casareño Ingles said...

In the land where Mr. Bean is el presidente del gobierno it wouldn't surprise you to learn that:

1. If you forget your PIN, just go to the bank and the cashier will read it off the screen to you.

2. When paying by plastic at most petrol stations it is wise to have your PIN written on a piece of paper. You pass this to the cashier to key in. The cashier is frequently unable to pass the keypad across the counter as the cable isn't long enough.

Mme Cyn said...

I am awfully glad I keep my cash under my mattress.

Aaron said...

I am sure I have all this to look forward to with the red triangles. I thought it was a major accomplishment getting an ATM card and PIN number from them - but for some reason they have sent me two PIN numbers for the only ATM card I have....


The opinions expressed in this weblog are the works of the Grumpy Goat, and are not necessarily the opinions shared by any person or organisation who may be referenced. Come to that, the opinions may not even be those of the Grumpy Goat, who could just be playing Devil's Advocate. Some posts may be of parody or satyrical [sic] nature. Nothing herein should be taken too seriously. The Grumpy Goat would prefer that offensive language or opinions not be posted in the comments. Offensive comments may be subject to deletion at the Grumpy Goat's sole discretion. The Grumpy Goat is not responsible for the content of other blogs or websites that are linked from this weblog. No goats were harmed in the making of this blog. Any resemblance to individuals or organisations mentioned herein and those that actually exist may or may not be intentional. May contain nuts.